Friday, April 1, 2011

April is the best month

Oh, hey! I'm not dead. Isn't that great?

So, it's April. I love this month, and not only because it's my birthday month. This Sunday, the 3rd, I'll turn 29. Lately I've been thinking a lot about getting older, and I've come to some conclusions. But more on that later, because right now I'm going to tell you something else.

Today is April Fool's Day. Did you now? Has someone played a prank on you?

I hate April Fool's Day. I'm usually a very practical person and it really gripes my bottom when someone tricks me. Also, I have a very transparent face. What I'm thinking shows very clearly on my money maker, so I'm not good at lying. In order to pull off a good prank you must be good at telling lies. So, the "Fool" part of April 1st is not my favorite, but I'm glad it's April.

In honor of this most horrible holiday, I thought I'd tell you about a little conversation I had with Andy earlier this week. He wasn't trying to trick me, but the outcome of the conversation was something completely different than what I had expected at the beginning, so in essence, he fooled me.

Anyway, we were sitting in the living room. He was watching something on television and I was looking at something on the computer, "window" shopping, no doubt. Out of nowhere Andy pipes up and says, "Do you know what I wish someone had told me about us getting married?"

Danger! Danger! Tread carefully!

What on earth have I done wrong? We haven't even had so much as a petty argument in a while, so I really had no idea what brought this on. Not that we needed to be in a fight for him to think something like this, but it's generally the disagreements that make you wish someone had prepared you ahead of time how to deal with it.

There was no getting out of it, though, so I girded my loins, prepared myself for the worst and asked, "No, what?"

You'll never, ever guess what he said. Prepare yourself.

"I wish someone had told me ahead of time that I was supposed to say something at our rehearsal dinner. I would have like to have had time to prepare something." He said.

WHAT?! What on earth made him think of that?

There were a couple of reactions going on in my head after I heard that little bit of loveliness. First I thought (and said), "Oh my gosh! Get over it already!" You see, we have been married for just over four and a half years now, and in that time whenever someone brings up our wedding or he hears the words "rehearsal dinner" he goes on and on about how he had to give a speech that night and no one had told him and why hadn't they told him because he didn't mind having to do it but he would have liked some advance warning so he would have been able to think about what to say, and for the love of mercy, build a bridge, Andy!

My second reaction was to realize that after all these years the worst thing he can think of about our marriage, the thing that blind sided him the most, was something that happened before we were even married. Really? Nothing else? So I asked, "Is there anything about actually being married that you wish you'd known?" He said, "Nope. I think it's been pretty normal."

And you know what? I think he's right. I don't know about normal, but there haven't really been any surprises. I mean, there have been some unexpected things that life threw at us, like job loss and in particular my car crash, but those could/would have happened with or without us being married. All-in-all though, I got what I expected out of marriage, and I guess he has too, so far.

We're happy together. As a bride you have so many expectations and big ideas of what it's going to be like once you're married. Now, four and a half years later, being happy seems like a pretty big accomplishment. At the end of the day, that's the most I ask for and need. Being happy with my husband makes all of the other inadequacies that life throws my way seem less important. I expected so much, but got exactly what I needed. It's funny how that works, isn't it?

Happy April!

No comments:

Post a Comment