Friday, August 6, 2010

Project 365, week 31 and a long note about my week

This week I went down to Raleigh to spend some time with Julie. We drank girly wine and watched girly movies and ate things our husbands either wouldn't like or wouldn't approve of. We talked about going for a run several times, but talking about it was as far as we ever got because we stayed up too late at night and ate too much pie. We so seldom get to have any real girl time anymore thought, so I'm not going to feel guilty for not running this week and indulging in too many calories. Also, I had a doctor's appointment schedule for the end of the week and being with Julie gave me a distraction from the stress that surely would have built up if I'd been at home.

Yesterday I came home. I left at exactly the wrong time and found myself in rush hour traffic in the middle of a torrential downpour. Also, The Hulk doesn't like to idle and the engine died three times in the middle of traffic on the interstate which sent me into a mild panic attack because I was pretty certain that if we didn't start to move in earnest soon, The Hulk was going to go into full on revolt mode and refuse to turn on again at all. But I managed to make it work. The Hulk and I have an understanding, so we made it home alright.

I walked in the door and found the apartment exactly as I had expected - all a muss. Andy hadn't made the bed all week. There were shoes everywhere. His clean clothes were still sitting exactly where I left them waiting for him to put them away. The pile was a little smaller though, as he had been wearing clean clothes all week, and discarding them on the bedroom floor each night. Also the kitchen was a disaster. Andy and Roommate make jalapeno poppers and shrimp last night on the grill and the evidence of their effort was spread all over the counters. It was just easier for me to clean it up than to throw a fit and honestly I was tired and cleaning the mess took less energy than yelling at someone else to do it.

And then when I started to gather up the dishes I noticed how disgusting the counters were and I asked if they had wiped them down before they started to prepare the food. I already knew the answer because there were two dead flies and rabbit hair all over the place. So no, they didn't, but they prepared the food on cutting boards and plates. Um, still gross.

My appointment was this morning with Dr.F. We were pretty sure he was going to release me, but I was still nervous. It's just a reaction I have now when I go to any doctor. I had made an early appointment so I could get it over with and not spend the day dwelling on it, so I set my alarm last night and got up when it went off at 8. I had to pee so I went in the bathroom and then left for a minute to go into the kitchen for something. Then, as I was walking back to the bathroom I hear the door shut and thought it was Andy. When I walked in the hall I realized it was not, in fact, Andy, but Roommate, who had gotten up a full hour earlier than usually.

The man NEVER gets up before 9, but the one morning that I need the freaking bathroom he decided he needs to be an early riser. I was furious and if I hadn't been afraid he was naked I would have barged in and told him to get the hell out of my bathroom, and while he was at it go ahead an move out already, for mercy's sake!!!!!! Instead I went back into the kitchen and started slamming cabinet doors while I made some breakfast. It was not a good start to the day and I was pretty certain that was a sign that my appointment was going to be bad.

Thankfully, after nearly four years of marriage, Andy has learned that when I'm that mad it's best to just pretend like I'm an explosive device and steer clear. He left me alone to stew on the sofa and after one abortive attempt to get Roommate out of the bathroom he sat down as far away from me as he could to wait out the storm. Twenty minutes later Roommate vacated and I got in the shower. Lucky for him traffic wasn't bad this morning and we made it to the office with five minutes to spare.

We saw Dr.F. He's a very chipper, positive type of guy. He's also a complete and total goofball. Today he was wearing a tie with the cartoon patient from Operation on it. I've never, ever seen him wear a normal tie. I wonder what he's like when he isn't at work.

The appointment was really short. He talked a lot about how great I looked and how everything could have turned out so much worse. He looked in my ears and down my throat and in my nose, of course. He said it "was a perfect nose" meaning that it was all healed up and clear. Then he released me.

Andy and I left the office. I wanted to cry, but I held it together because Andy doesn't deal very well with me crying. But I was just feeling so relieved because Dr.F said everything we had been waiting a year to hear, and I could finally turn a page in this never ending story. I was also feeling scared and stressed because there are a lot of chapters left before we can close the book and put it on the shelf. I've said it so many times and I'm sure I'll say it many more, but I just want my life back. And now it's right in front of me and it's almost tangible, making me want it that much more, but there are some really big hurdles still left to jump before I can get there. All this was on my mind on the way home and it didn't occur to me until we got back to the apartment that I missed a perfect opportunity for the photo of the day. I should have had Andy take my picture with Dr.F or snap a picture of me leaving the office for the last time. The Last Time.

But I didn't take either of those because I was a mess and completely too wrapped up in my feelings to think about anything so obvious. So I guess you'll have to be satisfied with a picture of "a perfect nose."

Week in pictures July 31 - August 6

The beginning of the end. Two gray hairs

Head in the clouds. Literally

Deliciously home grown

Now this is what girl's night should look like

It's been a long, long time since I took a bubble bath

Ahhh, refreshing

Crappy drive home

"Now that's a perfect nose!" - Dr.F

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